Posts Tagged ‘ dumbass ’

9 reasons the Northwest pilots missed their destination

Oct 23rd, 2009 | By | Category: snewz

airplaneThough we’ll never know for certain why the pilots missed their destination, through the power of conjection, we can come up with some real, scientifically sound theories as to why Northwest Flight 188 passed Minneapolis and kept going for 150 miles.



Japanese Windows 7 Fail

Oct 23rd, 2009 | By | Category: videos

windows7

Proving that Windows 7 is the perfect followup to Windows Vista, this video comes from a live Japanese TV news show. The demonstration is supposed to involve a man using the touch-screen functionality that Windows 7 offers. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work.



Drunkest Guy Ever: The Silent Film

Oct 23rd, 2009 | By | Category: videos

silent_drunk_filmMillions of people have scoured the internet for videos of people, animals, and other situations that are simultaneously absurd and fascinating. The most recent viral video that fits this requirement is all over youtube and titled: Drunkest Guy Ever.



Adventures in Laziness – Dirty Dishes

Oct 20th, 2009 | By | Category: snewz

Look at that sink! It's useless!

When it comes to committing yourself to a simple maintenance act in order to improve your home’s hygiene level, dealing with plates, cups, knives, forks, and sporks after you’ve eaten is not an overly difficult task, particularly when you consider the overall health benefits to maintaining a clean home. Who wants to get some sort of crazy disease from a mold spore in their kitchen sink? I know these things seem to be really curable on House, but they’re not usually so pleasant.

But what is the cure? How can I save myself?



RE: The Spam Folder

Oct 14th, 2009 | By | Category: Featured Article, revewz, snewz

Yes. The spam you can eat. No, dummy. E-mail spam!People no longer need to be subject to the constant con-artistry that lives in their spam folders, but it is sometimes required to delve into the pile in order to retrieve a prized e-mail that may have been misdirected. Whether looking for a response from a beautiful girl, waiting for a message on an important banking matter, or any other occasion in which life itself may hinge upon a single e-mail, sometimes it just doesn’t come. Or it doesn’t seem to come.

She really liked me, though. I’m sure of it… maybe it went to my spam folder. It does happen. But what else is going on in there?



Jacques Chirac sends his dog to ‘the farm’

Oct 2nd, 2009 | By | Category: snewz

In case you hadn’t heard, Jacques Chirac sent Sumo, his Maltese terrier, to the ‘the farm’ today after a line of domestic disturbances, drug abuse, and other signs pointing to Sumo’s life spiraling out of control.

It wasn’t always as bad as this. Back when Sumo joined the Chirac family, he lived the high life at the Élysée Palace, running free on the grounds, having an entourage of security, and his choice of any piece of tail Paris had to offer. That all ended one fateful day in May of 2007, when President Jacques Chirac became former President Jacques Chirac.



NCIS: LA and the Stereotyping of Latinos

Sep 29th, 2009 | By | Category: revewz, snewz

No, not that kind of stereotypical Mexican.
Perhaps I’m being unfair. Maybe it’s a little early in the show. I might even be acting a little over-sensitive to the subject. That’s what I thought last week when watching NCIS: Los Angeles for the first time.

After watching the second episode, I realize that I’m probably right, though.

Right about what? The fact that apparently the writers of NCIS: Los Angeles consider the ‘bad guys’ to be the Latinos.



Grey’s Anatomy Season 6 Pilot Has Most Retarded Running Joke Ever

Sep 24th, 2009 | By | Category: revewz, snewz

No, dummy. I'm talking about Grey's Anatomy, the show, not Gray's Anatomy, the book. That's not even from Gray's Anatomy. That's DaVinci's Vitruvian Man.

Okay, so George is dead, Izzie’s alive, drama, drama, drama, etc. Welcome to another ‘very special episode’ of Grey’s Anatomy. I’m not going to write a review about the episode. If you watch the show, you saw it, so you don’t need me to pussyfoot my way through recapping it or any of that crap. I just have one thing to say about it:

Ceviche isn’t “a chopped up fish dish.”



Adventures in Laziness – I still wear Crocs

Sep 24th, 2009 | By | Category: revewz, snewz

One man's lazy footwear is another man's... ugly.

Yes, I still wear Crocs. No, I wasn’t cryogenically frozen back in the summer of 2006 only to be reanimated today. I wear them and I love them.

Well, maybe love is a strong word. I wear them because they’re convenient and comfortable. For a great many people in the fashion world, the phrase ‘convenient and comfortable’ screams ‘bad taste.’ Well, they’re probably right. To heck with them and To heck with good taste. I don’t wear Crocs when I’m performing with an orchestra, having a business meeting, or roofing. I wear them when I’m walking the dog, getting the paper, putzing around town, or cooking.



The Long Journey Home

Sep 14th, 2009 | By | Category: Featured Article, snewz

Viva le France!
Sit back and relax, citizen, while I tell you a true tale of my personal foolery while traveling home from Rome to NY via London.

The reason I was in Rome was that I had taken a course on Renaissance art and felt inspired to see things firsthand. Being a student, I booked the cheapest flight I could get (Air India), got myself a fantastically inexpensive hostel in Rome ($8/night), and traveled with only a backpack for 2 weeks.