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Adventures in Laziness – I eat my ice cream with a fork

Sep 17th, 2009 | By | Category: revewz, snewz

Today I ate ice cream with a fork. This may not seem like much of a big deal, but the result was far better than I had expected.

I just finished eating a nice healthy salad and wanted a nice unhealthy dessert. I got up from my den and went to the kitchen to grab a pint of ice cream and a spoon. Being that I’m a fool, I forgot to run my dishwasher last night and discovered that all of my spoons were dirty.

Being the resourceful type, I remembered that I had a plastic spoon, still in the rapper, in my computer desk. Satisfied with this, I decided to bring the ice cream back with me and wait until it was soft enough to tackle with my plastic spoon.

Ice Cream + Fork = Flavor Explosion

Ice Cream + Fork = Flavor Explosion

When I got back to my desk, I started putzing around on the internet when I had a brainstorm. I had the metal fork that I had used to eat my salad. I wiped it down with a napkin and decided to give the fork a shot at my very hard container of ice cream. The result was incredible.

The plan was that I would stick my fork into the ice cream and be able to eat it. I wasn’t expecting much more than that. I mean, what difference could there be? How about the best texture from ice cream than I’d ever had before?

The thing about eating ice cream with a spoon is that you’re not getting much variance in the surface. A spoon is basically a flat plane, enhanced by a curve. Using a fork gives you four tines, each containing four flat surfaces. I could immediately taste the advantage these extra surfaces gave.

The science behind this is similar to having a one-pound stone and one-pound of sand. One pound of sand has a much larger surface area because you add up all of the individual pieces to get the total. Increasing the surface area of that which effects your taste buds results in a greater saturation of flavor.

Chefs know this, which is why a lot of spices are crushed, ground, or minced. Realizing that I had come across one of the great culinary secrets of the 21st century, I took it upon myself to experiment a little. Being that this is a chronicle of a lazy adventure, it was going to be a very small experiment.

I raked my fork across the icy surface of my iced cream in the hopes that I would get even more flavor. The theory behind my endeavor proved to be very sound. I had awakened the gods, Ben and Jerry, and tasted something astonishing.

Never before had I questioned the logic behind ice cream. I had never wondered why it had to be frozen. The combination of creaminess and crystallization is unfathomable. Throw in some crushed vanilla beans, chocolate, pretzels, and other subtle flavors and you have a gourmet masterpiece.

I do plan on continuing my life as a forked ice-cream eater, but I am not turning away the spoon forever. As I said, I’m lazy. If I forget about the fork and grab a spoon the next time, I don’t expect to be going back to the kitchen to correct my mistake. I also suspect that it will be a long time before I get to try the next experiment that I have in mind.

Titanium spork - The ultimate ice cream utensil?

Titanium spork - The ultimate ice cream utensil?

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  1. […] you enjoyed this installment of Adventures in Laziness, check out I Eat My Ice Cream with a Fork, the original Adventure in Laziness, or I Still Wear Crocs, the second in the […]

  2. Great post, my favorite ice cream is rum and raisen.

  3. Great post, my favorite lolly is a strawberry mivvi.

  4. I totally eat ice cream with a fork! Not sure when or why I started doing that, but it really is the only way to go. Maybe it initially had something to do with picking out treats from rock-hard Ben & Jerry’s pints. Since then I’ve noticed that approaching the product with a less intrusive utensil (slender tines v. wide plane) minimizes melting. Metal is, after all, a heat conductor.

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